Don't screw up

Seven months ago I bought into a bike shop. It felt good. I was 27, owned part of a business, was married to a gorgeous and brilliant woman, and had a cat and a dog. Things seemed pretty strait forward. Don't screw up.

I did a few races over the course of the year. I messed up a couple of those. Crashed. Bonked. Didn't prepare enough. I finished all but one, and still won money for that one. Overall though a pretty good year on the bike. Don't screw up.

November was good. Awesome time spent resting and recovering from a long season. A great month at the shop. We spent a wonderful Thanksgiving in Cincinnati. I had some amazing rides without any point. It was a good month. Don't screw up.

December started well enough. Jess and I were hitting the gym. I was kick starting my training year. We made a trip up to Roanoke and Farmville to visit Jess' dad and my sister. And we screwed up.

We got sick. Jess had the worst of it so she went to the doctor and I kept working. And kept getting worse. And kept screwing up. Finally after a week of being sick, I went to the doctor. Two hours later the verdict was in. Pneumonia and some form of flu.

I screwed up. Now after a week of being stuck at home with short forays out into the world. I am starting to feel better. I still get tired easily. I still cough up a lung if I change the angle of my torso or the temperature of the air I am breathing.

I have effectively screwed up the beginning of my training season for next year. I messed up almost all of Jess' and mines Christmas plans (except for Christmas day itself). I put more pressure on my partners at a time of year when no one needs it.

The point of this rambling is this... growing up, being an adult, means screwing up. You make mistakes. You don't prepare quite right. You let your guard down. You get sick. What you have to remember is this. It's not about not screwing up. That is something that is easy to loose sight of when everything is going right. What makes life worth living is pushing yourself. Your going to fall down. And maybe that means that isn't the right path to go down. Or maybe it just means you need to go about it a different way or with more gusto.

So with everyone's favorite resolution day on the horizon, don't screw up... go for broke instead.